Have you ever felt completely chopped off at your knees? As if no matter who you are or what you do that you can never be more than what someone’s idea of you is. That is what it feels like when I am plopped into the “only eighteen” box, the lid is sealed and that is my identity. But I am so much more than eighteen. I am so much bigger than an age.
I look into the Bible to comfort the parts of my soul that feel so stunted by people’s idea of my age and what that qualifies [and more often, disqualifies] me for. When I look into this book, full of God breathed stories and scenarios and truths- I see youth. I see triumph coming from people my age or younger. You have your David, slaying a literal giant while all the “grown ups” trembled with fear and lives outside of the strength God gives his children. You got your Joseph [granted he messed up a lot] who could interpret dreams and ended up with much power and responsibility. And for heavens sake, Mary. Mary, who at the tender age of fourteen [roughly] got pregnant with the child of the Creator, delivered Jesus and raised him. I know for a fact that Abba does not look at me, sigh, and say, “well, you’re only eighteen Mags…” There is so much scripture that encourages me to chase after what God has for me, and even more scripture that tells all those grown folk to let me chase after Him. “Let the little children come.” So why do you keep stopping me? Keep stunting my options. Why on Earth do you tell me I am “only” eighteen. I am not “only” anything. I am not “only” a girl. I am a daughter, a sister and a friend. I am not “only” American, I am Irish and German, with a heart tied to Colombia. I am not “only” tall, I am strong, too. I am not defined by the “only” of this world. I am a daughter of the Creator. The same Creator who is laying paths before me, who has big, grand things for my life, who I desire to glorify with my every breath. So why do you look at me and say “only”.
MMore than my age, I am mature. I have some wisdom in my brain. I am brave. I am a worshipper. A prayer warrior. A photographer. A lover of icecream. A writer. I have this big heart, created by my Savior to lavish people in His love. Being eighteen doesn’t affect that. My eighteen years means nothing. You cannot define me by my years, I will not allow it, my God is bigger than your thought and lack of vision for His work. I do not look at you and define you by the fact that you could be closer to death than me, so please, before you even try to consider my age- consider my story, my heart, and the things God is doing in my life.
It is not the life of an only eighteen year old, it is the life of a girl on fire for Jesus- regardless of twelve years, nineteen years, forty seven or four hundred and fifty. God doesn’t work in us according to our years, and we do not all move in the same sequence.
I am not an age. I am not a number. And I will live fully in what Abba calls me to, no matter the circumstance. I will continue to pursue Jesus with child-like faith, dancing in His presence!
The end.